In the beginning

For Christmas (yes, I know it was 6 months ago) one of my favorite people in the whole wide world made me and my daughter matching aprons.  Totally the best thing ever.  I was so happy, I was going to send her a pic of us wearing them.

When I saw this photo I was horrified.  Hor-ri-fied!!!!!!  Sure it's a bad angle (photographs should be taken from slightly above, this is from below) but that doesn't account for how wide I am.  I never sent it.  Instead, I sent one of the baby solo.

The me I see in the mirror doesn't match what's shown above.  I obviously think a little too highly of myself because me in the mirror is at least 30 pounds lighter.  I said I was getting my life together.  I was going to lose 50 pounds before my birthday.  And I did right for a couple of days and then went right back to eating my feelings.  My feelings are bad and they must be punished with food.

I restarted in February.  Same pep talk, this time with photographic evidence of my scale bending weight

Same thing.  I did right for a couple of weeks max, then went back to self medicating.  In fact, I was super happy when I found a lunch spot with a giant slice of pizza and a pop for less than $4.  That wasn't a good thing.

A month or so ago, the husband and I went to a wedding.  We had a nice time, I even wore a dress.  And then we stood really far apart when we embraced because of the 9 months of fat I am close to delivering.

This is the beginning of my weight loss journey.  I deserve better than this.  So does my family.  It's time for me to do better.